TSTL Heroines: Too Skinny To Live
I’m reading yet another novel featuring a “too thin” heroine who doesn’t know how to eat a decent meal. In this book, though she’s told the hero who’s taken her out to dinner that she’s starving, and readers know she’s eaten only once in two days, she “picks at her barely eaten salad” and leaves the food she ordered on her plate. WTF? Is this normal behavior?
Why is it that in so many novels the heroine skips meals? Is there something wrong with having a healthy appetite? If I read one more story where the heroine “isn’t hungry,” though we know she hasn’t eaten more than a handful of nuts since the day before, these wall-bangers will fly across my family room at warp speed. Enough is enough.
Failure to eat doesn’t make a heroine chic or sexy or smart. It makes her TSTL as in Too Skinny To Live. If she’s hungry, she’s probably cranky and less effective. Lack of nutrition causes ill health; just as eating too much can cause health problems. Give me a heroine who knows the importance of a wholesome breakfast. Who actually eats her salad when her stomach rumbles. Enjoys a satisfying dinner. Or who… dear god, actually orders dessert.
I want to read about heroines who savor a piece of chocolate without guilt. Who eat an occasional burger with fries. Whose lust for life is as obvious in bed as out of bed.
The heroines in the books I write are beautiful women of normal weight. They love their heroes and enjoy sharing healthy meals with them. A recent poll states that most men don’t like skinny women. Men prefer softness. Why, then, do some authors insist on proliferating the too-thin archetype? How can we, as readers and authors, create change? Do we want to?
What do you think?
–Adele Dubois
January 26th, 2010 at 4:06 pm
Ohhhh honey! You have hit on a sore spot with me on this one. I’m sick to DEATH of reading nothing but skinny heroines who don’t live a healthy life, don’t enjoy food (how unreal is THAT) and look as if a puff of wind would blow them away.Honestly, I seldom write stick skinny women. I call most of my heroines “curvy girls”. They have boobs and butts and savor a piece of chocolate almost as much as a good orgasm. It’s time for us to get ‘real’ with our heroines.
January 26th, 2010 at 4:14 pm
Heh. On our first date, Hubs told me to order whatever I wanted.
I did.
And I ate it all, too.
He’s since told me that I was the only girl who’d ever eaten a whole meal in front of him. And he liked that about me.
Now? I wouldn’t mind giving a few of those meals back… LOL.
But, yes, I know what you mean. Eat something, dammit! Starving and leaving food on the plate actually sounds to me like the author didn’t think that scene through on all points. It’s the details that can screw us up and I think he/she missed that big time.
Have to say, though, that you and I must be reading different stories, because I’ve yet to notice anything like eating habits in any of the books I’ve read.
January 26th, 2010 at 4:18 pm
Somebody finally wrote about what I’ve been thinking! You go, Adele!
I am of average weight. My husband and I have a glass of wine every night before dinner and enjoy cooking together. We like to eat. Yet, in dozens of books I’ve read I could count the number of meals the heroine ate in a week on one hand. It’s ridiculous.
I like the fact that the heroines in your books eat meals. Keep up the good work.
January 26th, 2010 at 4:24 pm
Regina–Some of my favorite authors write about kick-ass heroines who chase and kill bad guys, and then say they “aren’t hungry” when presented with food. Doesn’t it take fuel to hunt villains? I just don’t get it. The guys eat. Why shouldn’t the gals?
Judi–I’ll give you a list of books offline to reference. You’ll see what I mean.
Marie–Enjoy that wine and pasta! Thanks for the kudos. :Smooch:
Thanks for visiting and posting.
Best–Adele
January 26th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
Amen, sister! One of my all-time favorite books was “Bet Me” by Jennifer Crusie, because the heroine was sized like a real woman. The hero fed her Krispy Kremes, for Pete’s sake! Possibly one of the best love scenes I’ve ever read.
Granted, I’ve had days where I got so busy, I didn’t have time to eat, but someone who skips meals without a good reason needs to have her head examined. It’s not healthy and it perpetuates a lousy model for young women who think they have to be Vogue-thin to be liked. SO wrong!
Did anyone else hear about the study that said that the smell of donuts turns men on more than the smell of expensive perfume?
January 26th, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Adele, we don’t need one more influence that glorifies the anorexic culture that is wrecking the health and reproductive capabilities of many girls and young women in our society. Stick to your guns and I’ll meet you there with some steak and potatoes.
January 26th, 2010 at 4:48 pm
I’ve always loved the Barbra Streisand’s character in The Mirror Has Two Faces. She loves food and eats like she savors every bite. The hero begins to fall in love with her as she relishes the meat on her plate. Her somewhat full hips captivate him while she walks away to go to the restroom. Of course she gets all thin and high maintenance through the course of the movie but makes up for it at the very end. She is reunited with the hero who says he loved her the way she was and she says something to the effect of “that’s good because I’m starving!”
January 26th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
Oh Carla! I looooved Bet Me with the Krispy Kremes and the heroine who ate and enjoyed like a real woman. I actually think one of my favorite books was Night Play (Sherrilyn Kenyon). Bride was big and beautiful and the scene with her and Vane in the restaurant was priceless. Damn it. She was nervous about eating too much in public and Vane put a stop to it. Perfect. Love that book.
January 26th, 2010 at 4:52 pm
Carla–You’re right. The scent of a good Krispy Kreme filled donut trumps the scent of “Joy” every time. Ask any guy.
We all forget to eat on occasion. But the deliberate avoidance of meals when presented with food after long periods of fasting is abnormal. I’m tired of reading about anorexic heroines.
Miriam–I love steak (med-well) and potatoes (mashed or baked with sour cream). You’re on!
Thanks for visiting and posting.
Best–Adele
January 26th, 2010 at 4:58 pm
Twinkles–Good example! I love that line–”…good, because I’m starving!”
Regina–Another good example. My muse is working overtime!
Thanks for playing!
Best–Adele
January 26th, 2010 at 4:58 pm
Amen, Adele! When I started writing I decided my heroines would be plus-size and the men would love them - and rarely notice their size unless they LIKED a big girl.
I’d be happy to read about normal size women too. When every romance heroine had a waist so tiny the hero’s two hands could span it, I quit reading romance. When I came back to romance, I deliberately started looking for plus-size heroines. I was thrilled to find that Ellora’s Cave had a “rubenesque” line and they weren’t the only ones.
I’ll have to remember the “too skinny to live” thing - it made my day!
January 26th, 2010 at 5:02 pm
I am writing a heroine right now who loves CREAM and SUGAR and CORNETTOS with her latte!
The world is full of delicious temptations, and some of them SHOULD be great food, beautifully plated and WELL ENJOYED.
I vote for the Clean Plate CLUB!
January 26th, 2010 at 5:19 pm
Francesca–Glad my TSTL parody made your day.
Cerise–Food is the most basic human need. Good food is a pleasure to be enjoyed. I agree!
Thanks so much for your visits and posts!
Best–Adele
January 26th, 2010 at 5:25 pm
Oh man, it’s like the hangover of the Chick Lit phenomenon just refuses to vacate my skull for good.
I’m no patron saint of feminism (as much as I’d like to think I am) and I’ve cultivated my share of borderline eating disorders and can understand far too easily where Bridget Jones was coming from with her obsessive food documentation. That said, I don’t want to read about that bullshit! It’s maddening enough to live with those impulses rattling around in my head, let alone to then read about in my leisure time. Yes, I can find it relatable, but I’m so sick of self-hating women being made out as lovable and quirky, and the laughably small majority of folks who don’t eat when stressed comprising the romance heroine mainstay.
Although, on the topic of Chick Lit and its cinematic and television counterparts, I will point out something about Sex and the City (which frequently annoyed me for the way it often negatively stereotyped both women AND men) which I love — those chicks knew how to eat. And drink. And they made eating sexy. Plus the show let Miranda get fat (well, Hollywood’s version of fat) when she was depressed. Like a normal person! Now don’t get me started on conspicuous materialism — Sex and the City doesn’t come out so hot in that debate.
Anyhow, no offense to any Chick Lit fans or purveyors, but I’m so relieved that trend has died down. Ten years of pedestalized shoe shopping and binge drinking… I don’t completely understand the huge paranormal surge currently taking over the publishing scene, but I’ll take a shifter over a whiny underfed compulsive brand consumer any day of the week. Great post, Adele.
January 26th, 2010 at 5:29 pm
Cara–Wow, your well-thought-out comments blew me away! Thanks for your points of view. Visit again soon.
Note to readers:
I’m joining a friend for lunch and then we’re seeing a movie where we’ll eat popcorn. Be back to check on comments later this afternoon. Thanks!
January 26th, 2010 at 6:42 pm
Adele,
I celebrated your blog by going to fridge and eating a miniature eclair. I hope you enjoyed lunch and popcorn. Food has such erotic potential, why would anyone skimp on it a romance novel? And usually it’s not low-cal salad being eaten off anyone’s bodies in the best of scenes.
January 26th, 2010 at 7:28 pm
I agree, it seems TSTL for a heroine to pick at her food in the hero’s presence. Eating’s one of life’s little pleasures and, like sex, should be savored. That said, I tend to write heroines of normal size, and when I do a plus size one (Shifting Control, for instance), I try to emphasize healthy weight control while making sure the reader knows the hero loves his woman with or without the extra pounds.
Why? Because carrying excessive weight isn’t healthy. It shortens life and causes health problems that wouldn’t happen if the person maintained weight in the normal range based on BMI. I realize it’s not easy to take off excess pounds but would hate to encourage readers to pack them on.
January 26th, 2010 at 8:23 pm
Adele,
Great blog. I know where you’re coming from. However, I’ve never read a book where the heroine didn’t like to eat. I’ve written books and short stories where the heroine has been so busy she forgot to eat lunch, then her stomach rumbles as a reminder. I usually have one or two dinner scenes in my books. I try to limit my eating scenes and make them short because I heard Hilary Sares once say there should be absolutely no dinner scenes in any stories because they slow the story down. I don’t completely agree with that, but I’ve never forgotten it. My first book was about a caterer and I loved writing about food in that book. It was such fun. All of my heroines are short because I’m short. They’re all of normal weight, not real skinny but not heavy either. I get annoyed when I’m watching a TV show or movie and the characters have a great looking meal in front of them, and they run off to do something and leave the food. That really, really bothers me. I personally never leave food on my plate.
January 26th, 2010 at 9:15 pm
I’ve seen the trend too. One book that I was reading had the heroine taking half slices of pizza and sipping the hero’s beer. I generally write healthy heroines. The sad thing is that this trend just seems to be mimicking all the others. Skinny is ‘in’. Personally, I find it gross to be that thin and I lecture my, soon to be, fifteen year old all the time about the difference between healthy and skinny. She’s built the way most women would kill to be built, but she still asks me regularly if she’d getting fat. These girls are our next generation of readers. I hope we can create a better image for them to strive for. The above, slightly, mentioned author is my daughters favorite, by the way. Fingers crossed that it doesn’t keep growing until the heroines disappear completely.
January 27th, 2010 at 12:11 am
Michelle–You’re right, I haven’t read about lovers eating salad off each other’s bodies in a sex scene. In my book DREAM TRAVELER my H/h did some amazing things with grapes and strawberries.
Ann–I agree a normal weight is ideal. The heroines in my novels are not too skinny and not overweight–but just right. They maintain a healthy weight by eating healthy foods. Picking at salads and skipping two meals out of three each day makes no sense to me. Books that describe heroines who don’t eat really get on my nerves. Lol.
Carolyn–Glad you enjoyed the blog. I like your heroines and your restaurant settings.
Jeannine–As the mother of a teen daughter, I hear you. Keeping my fingers crossed for her, too.
Thanks for your participation. I enjoyed hearing from you.
Best–Adele
January 27th, 2010 at 3:03 am
It’s funny…I have to think hard to figure out a lot of things about my characters. One poor girl doesn’t have a last name, for heaven’s sake, but food? Oh, my heroines love to eat.
First book published, first line? “6450 calories stared up at Robyn. ”
(The heroine has taken an entire chocolate mocha cheesecake with her on her backcountry ski trip. What can I say? I love food! So do my girls.;) And BTW, she and the hero enjoyed that cheesecake very much, thank you!)
January 27th, 2010 at 5:05 am
I just finished reading Naked Dragon by Annette Blair. There is one scene where the hero(who had just recently returned to Earth after centuries away)saw a fashion show. He wanted to know who had been abusing all those women.
I like books that portray those of us who aren’t stick figures as sexy and worthy in our own right.
January 27th, 2010 at 2:51 pm
Unless the author immediately justified the heroine eating in such an unhealthy fashion, I would not finish reading the book…and probably I would never buy another by that author.
The same goes for an author writing about a heroine that was always “pigging out”. What’s attractive about that, regardless of size?
I don’t worry about describing heroines size-wise nearly as much as their personality and idiosyncrasies. Eating should be eating. Candy bar or salad. Coffee or steak.
I once wrote a short piece, distributed it among several people and asked them to read it and then describe the heroine. Each person had a different picture in their mind. It was kind of like when the cops talk to witnesses after a crime. Each witness sees something different. Maybe that should be the goal instead of describing every tiny detail (including their designer shoes). Frankly, I like something left to the imagination.
January 27th, 2010 at 3:07 pm
Vivian–6450 cheesecake calories? I’m sure your characters worked off all those calories on their cross country ski trip.
Sounds like a fun story.
Beth–Good analogy. We should write books that reflect normal-size women.
Thank you for stopping by to share your thoughts.
Best–Adele
January 27th, 2010 at 3:19 pm
Anny–You’ve summarized my thoughts perfectly. If a woman is eating a meal in a book we won’t notice how much she’s eating unless the author brings our attention to the amount. Why do so many writers make it a point to tell us the heroine “picks at her food” and “leaves it on her plate”?
If the author tells us the heroine hasn’t eaten all day, but when offered food she’s “not hungry” and doesn’t eat, we know that has to be a lie. It’s abnormal not to be hungry after two of three meals have been missed. I”ve read stories where the heroine hasn’t eaten since the day before and then finally chooses to drink a cup of coffee. What? A normal person would eat a sandwich with the coffee after not having eaten for 24 hours.
Ah well, we can only change the world in the books we write.
Thanks for visiting and posting.
Best–Adele
January 27th, 2010 at 5:24 pm
I write about real women. They have some hang ups, generally due to society telling them they’re too fat and they might ocassionally entertain the idea of a diet but generally they like their food and their proud of it. And restaurant scenes I write with my women in them include a description of what they’re eating and how much they’re enjoying it. Scentsual is one that leaps to mind, I had great fun describing the smells and tastes of the italian food my characters were digging in to. I love food, so do my characters and I won’t make any excuses for that. I shouldn’t need to.
January 27th, 2010 at 9:13 pm
I’ve been following the comments in this lively conversation. Sounds like your blog really struck a chord, Adele. Very interesting.
January 27th, 2010 at 9:19 pm
Victoria–I grew up eating Italian food. There’s nothing better. All my life I’ve lunched and dined with women friends. I can honestly say I’ve never seen a woman push her food around her plate without eating like some of the heroines described in fiction.
Marie–It’s been fun, hasn’t it?
Thanks so much for your contributions.
Best–Adele
January 28th, 2010 at 2:19 am
As one who has enjoyed a life-long love affair with Italian and Chinese food, I love reading books where the women enjoy everything about life–food, fun and sex! LOL! Two of my absolute favorite heroines are in Lori Foster’s “Too Much Temptation” and Bride in Sherrilyn Kenyon’s “Night Play”. They are women who have “realistic” figures and are so beautiful!! And I absolutely adore the way their men love them. To them they are gorgeous BECAUSE of their size not in spite of. *sigh*
Yeah…good post, Adele! Now I’m going to go find those books on my shelf…
January 28th, 2010 at 2:59 am
Naima–I too love Italian and Chinese food. Your comment caused a craving for Shrimp Lo Mein. (I see take-out in my future. Lol.) In my new release REV ME UP my heroine is a beautiful woman of normal size who eats when she’s hungry. That’s normal behavior–to eat when our body needs nourishment. A woman needs her strength!
Thanks for your insightful post.
Best–Adele
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:25 pm
Since I love to eat I find it ridulous how people can starve their bodies. Who actually orders just a salad when they go out. When I go out I want a nice steak or a great burger. How can people live on diet coke and a piece of bread. I think we need to teach our young girls to love there body. Most people aren’t a size 0.
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:21 am
Jennifer–You are so right. Who orders a salad and then picks at it and barely eats when they haven’t eaten a meal since the day before? Ridiculous.
Nice to see you again. Thanks for stopping by!
Best–Adele
February 14th, 2010 at 12:19 am
Adele, I couldn’t agree more!!! I never ever write about that kind of heroine. My heroines eat and damn well enjoy it, every luscious morsel.
February 14th, 2010 at 12:41 am
Savanna– I’m with you. The heroine in my upcoming fantasy novella cooks pancakes and eggs for breakfast. She’s my kind of woman!
Thanks so much for visiting and posting. Good to “meet” you!
Best–Adele